Set the mood with Cowsills’ classic, Hair
1. Justin’s perm, as told by his song Mirror
It’s like you’re my mirror, my mirror staring back at me… Justin, if I were your mirror, I would ask you why bleached funnel cake as a hairstyle was even a thought, much less an action.
2. The Saved By The Bell crew and their perms
When I wake up in the morning, and the ‘larm gives out a warning, I don’t think I’ll ever make it on time… Ideally, Screech and friends should wake up in the morning, apply a generous amount of anti-frizz serum, and gently blow dry for a calmer, more polished perm.
3. Madonna’s perm, as told by her song Bad Girl
Something’s missing and I don’t know why… Conditioner. You’re missing conditioner from your shower regimen.
4. Poison’s perms, as told by their song Every Rose Has Its Thorn
Was it something I said or something I did… The second one. Less teasing wouldn’t hurt anybody… I’m talking to you, Bret Michaels.
5. Mariah’s perm, as told by her song Touch My Body
In my imagination, I’d be all up on you… In your imagination, you should be taming that mane. Then we’ll talk.
6. Barbra’s perm, as told by her song Down With Love
Down with love, the root of all midnight blues… The roots on your scalp are the only roots that matter.
7. Guns and Roses’ perms, as told by their song Patience
But you know, love, there’s one more thing to consider… How about a detangler for those righteous strands.
8. And their hit Don’t Cry
Talk to me softly. There’s something in your eyes… My best bet is hair.
9. Beyonce’s perm, as told by her song Single Ladies
Wuh uh oh uh uh oh oh uh oh uh uh oh… I couldn’t have said it better myself.
10. Bon Jovi’s perm, as told by his song Livin’ On A Prayer
She says we’ve got to hold on to what we’ve got… Luckily for you, Bon, you’ve got a lot of hair to hold.
11. Twisted Sister’s perms, as told by their song We’re Not Gonna Take It
Oh, we’re not gonna take it. No, we ain’t gonna take it. Oh, we’re not gonna take it anymore. I assume you’re referring to knotted hair. It’s a relief you finally put your foot down.
12. Coming To America’s Darryl Jenks’ perm, as told by his commercial jingle Soul Glo
Just let your soul glow. Just let it shine through. Just let your soul glow. Feel that oh-so-silky-smooth… Stop it, Darryl. Just stop.
Note: Darryl Jenks is a fictional, celebrity character played by Eriq La Salle.
13. Whitesnake’s perms, as told by their song Slide It In
I know what you want. I can see what you’re looking for… I want that head of hair. And I’m looking for a realistic explanation as to how a group of men can achieve such quaffed manes.
14. Tom’s perm, as told by Forrest in the movie, Forrest Gump
Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get… If only life were like a perm. You’d always know curly bangs were never a good idea.
15. Victoria’s perm as told by her Spice Girls song Spice Up Your Life
Everything is free, all you need is positivity… And a conditioning treatment.
16. Kiss’ perms, as told by their song Rock And Roll All Nite
You’re looking fancy and I like your style… No, Kiss. YOU are looking fancy. If only I could run my fingers through each majestic wave…
17. Cinderella’s perms, as told by their song Nobody’s Fool
Searchin’ for a change of pace, life needs to be sweetened… Search no further. Transitioning those locks into corn rows is the answer to a sweeter, more fulfilling life.
18. Lionel’s perm, as told by his song Hello
I sometimes see you pass outside my door. Hello! Is it me you’re looking for… Actually, I was passing by to share the good news of a revolutionary product guaranteed to lock in those curls.
19. Bradley’s perm, as told by Phil in the movie, The Hangover
Jesus, he’s like a gremlin. Comes with instructions and s***… Hey now, Shirley Temple, I don’t think you have much room to talk.
Note: Bradley Cooper’s perm was set for his character in the 2013 film American Hustle.
20. And Phil Spector’s perm, as told by his song Be My Baby*
So won’t you say you love me? I’ll make you so proud of me. We’ll make ‘em turn their heads every place we go… Oh. My. Lanta. Heads have certainly turned with that hairdo.
*Phil wrote and produced Be My Baby, and it was performed by the 1960’s pop group, Ronettes.