I guess it’s true what they say: Noman can resist the dangly uncoordinated flopping siren dance of Taylor Swift.
Long live Taylor and Tom Hiddleston. LONG LIVE TIDDLESTON! (No? We’ve all decided to never call them that ever again? Cool. Got it.)
Granted, this is the LEAST shocking news of all time, as supposedly Tom is one of the nicest guys in British Hollywood and Taylor Swift really only dates one incredibly specific type, but it’s all still pretty exciting.
New love is always fun, and honestly they’re such beautiful, talented stars of screen and stage I bet them doing even the most basic of couple things like going out to the movies or dancing looks fantastic.
Wait, what’s that? We have a video of them dancing at the MetGala last month?!?!?
CLICK THE PLAY BUTTON! I NEED TO SEE THIS BEAUTIFUL MERGER OF TWO HUMANSWANS GENTLY GLIDING OVER THELAKE OF LIFE!
Oh God. Oh Godno. It’s like two overcooked lasagna noodles getting slapped together by the WHITEST chef in Italy. It looks like two cups of Chobani poured out onto a table in the middle of an earthquake. It’s like a HORRIBLE middle school interpretive dance that looks like a joke but is meant completely seriously.
I’m sorry for showing you this. I’m soooo sorry. I didn’t know it would be that.
Oh God, what have I done…
I sat next to [Taylor]at dinner that night… she was very charming. She is amazing. I’ve seen a couple of her videos… she’s very cool.
It turns out, NO ONE should be shocked Taylor and Calvin broke up just a few weeks later and now Taylor and Tom are a thing. This was a long time coming.
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