Who Should Be Your Patron Saint?

Because someone’s got to intercede on your behalf.

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  1. Ingram Publishing / Via Thinkstock
    1. Universal Pictures / Via drafthouse.com ✓ “Animal House”
    2. Samson Films / Via themoviebros.com ✓ “Once”
    3. Participant Media / Via inkkc.com ✓ “Contagion”
    1. American Entertainment / Via commentarama.blogspot.com ✓ “Wall Street”
    2. Regency Enterprises / Via spotlightreport.net ✓ “The Internship”
    3. Via dreamworks.wikia.com ✓ “Bee Movie”
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Who Should Be Your Patron Saint?

  1. You got: Saint Francis of Assisi

    Saint Francis of Assisi, patron saint of animals! Saint Francis was a traveling friar who took a vow of poverty after visiting St. Peter’s Basilica. He founded the franciscan order, allegedly received the stigmata as a sign of faith, and according to legend could communicate with animals.

    Jorisvo / Via Thinkstock

  2. You got: Saint Francis de Sales

    Saint Francis de Sales, patron saint of writers! Francis was a nobleman who decided to become a priest afer dropping his sword and realizing that it had fallen on another sword to form the shape of a cross. Francis later became a bishop whose spiritual writings were so powerful and insightful, they influence the church to this day.

    Via stfrancisdesales.ca

  3. You got: Saint Arnulf of Metz

    Saint Arnulf of Metz, patron saint of brewers! When thirsty pilgrims went to see his body, legend has it that their mugs mystically overflowed with beer. He might be a literal saint, but it’s clear Arnulf knew how to have a good time.

    Via commons.wikimedia.org

  4. You got: Saint Martha

    Saint Martha, patron saint of cooks! Martha once got mad at her sister for listening to Jesus speak instead of eating the food Martha made, but Jesus was like “it’s cool.” Everything was chill after that.

    Via saints.sqpn.com

  5. You got: Saint Raphael

    Raphael, patron saint of travel! Raphael is an archangel whose exploits are covered in the canonical Book of Tobit. He is often depicted with a fish because he miraculously healed Tobit’s blindness with a fish’s gallbladder, and also healed pilgrims who came to bathe in the Pool of Bethesda.

  6. You got: Saint Michael

    Saint Michael, patrion saint of protectors! Saint Michael is known as the head of God’s army. He looks out for everybody in heaven and beat the crap out of Satan not once but TWICE in biblical memory. Man, he’s so cool.

    Via shrineofsaintjude.net

  7. You got: Saint Cecilia

    Saint Cecilia, patron saint of musicians. When Cecilia was married, legend says she heard the music of heaven playing inside of her heart, hence her patronage of all things musical. When the Romans came after her for being a Christian, she proved to be nearly indestructible; neither suffocation nor the near-severation of her head from her body could kill her.

    Via arte-historia.com

  8. You got: Saint Juliana of Nicomedia

    Saint Juliana of Nicomedia, patron saint of the sick! Saint Juliana was secretly a Christian, so when her father asked her to marry a pagan she said no. They killed her, but not before she literally spat in the face of Satan and poured a cauldron of molten lead on her torturers. Her pagan fiancee was eaten by a lion.

    Via discardingimages.tumblr.com

  9. You got: Saint Martin of Porres

    Saint Martin of Porres, patron saint of social justice (and also of hairstylists)! Saint Martin was a Peruvian “volunteer” who initially could not become a priest because he was multiracial. He repeatedly disobeyed his superiors by caring for sick and injured people, but instead of being punished they gave him mad props for being a good guy. He was later ordained in the Dominican order.

    Via la.indymedia.org

  10. You got: Saint Gemma

    Saint Gemma, patron saint of students! She was an excellent student as a child but was not allowed to study as a nun because of her visions of Jesus and the Virgin Mary (you’d think that wouldn’t count against her, but OK). The church doubted her visions, but later admitted that her mystical powers could not be denied. She was made a saint a mere 20 years after her death.

    Via stgemmagalgani.com

  11. You got: Saint Ambrose

    Saint Ambrose, patron saint of…beekeepers? Wow, you must really like bees. Saint Ambrose was the bishop of Milan. When he was a baby, legend has it that bees flew onto this face and left honey on his tongue. This was an incredibly difficult result to get, you must be a very unique person!

    Via oca.org

  12. You got: Saint Homobonus

    Saint Homobonus, patron saint of businesspeople! Homonobus was an heir to a small fortune and a merchant by trade; he worked solely to fund his charity endeavors. He was known for being fair in business and extremely honest, and prospered on account of this reputation.

    Via cdd.linternet.com

  13. You got: Saint Isidore of Seville

    Saint Isidore of Seville, patron saint of the internet! Saint Isidore was a bishop and an academic who was practically a living encyclopedia. He was an expert in so many different fields that his writings, the Etymologies, were the standard source of knowledge for almost a thousand years! He would, however, probably have no clue what an internet actually is.

    Via telegraph.co.uk

  14. You got: Saint Cajetan

    You got…Saint Cajetan, patron saint of the unemployed! Hang in there, buddy.

    Via questpcs.com

  15. You got: Saint Anthony

    Saint Anthony, patron saint of lost items! Anthony was a Franciscian friar (no really, he was buddies with Saint Francis) whose extremely valuable book of scripture was stolen by a greedy student. He prayed so hard that the student was moved by the Holy Spirit to repent and return the book to him of his own free will. People pray to him when they lose stuff.

    Via marypages.com

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